Memphis or bust

September 21, 2010

I haven’t seen Laura since May. Maybe that’s not a long time, but before that I hadn’t seen her since December. And before that…

Well, let’s just not discuss it.

It’s not good for my mental health.

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Laura has lived in Memphis for forever. Forever means like 3 years. And, did I mention that Memphis is far? Well, it’s so far that it’s expensive to get there.

You can see why I have to stalk her.

But, it’s high time I get to Memphis. By hook or by crook  (but preferably by Harry Potter plane).

So, it’s time to start saving my pennies. I’m going to need 54,000 of them.

This is my public promise that I will come to Memphis upon collection of those pennies. Unless my mental health gets the best of me first – it might.

But I’ll only come provided that we can sing a lot of Elvis songs.

Please contribute to my Memphis fund. My sanity, and Laura’s, will appreciate it. I accept all forms of money and airline vouchers (Delta only).

I also accept cupcakes, just because.

The end.

– Sarah #2


True Life: I’m a stalker

August 12, 2010

I stalk my best friend, Laura. I am not even kidding. I literally stalk her.

Is she on gchat? No.

Is she on Facebook chat which I hate but will use to talk to her in extreme instances? No.

So a few days ago I see via Xbox that she’s on her Xbox watching Season 2 of Veronica Mars. I call her. She does not answer. I leave a message roughly saying, “Dude. You are watching Veronica Mars. TALK TO ME.”

I get an email the next day stating how she watched so much Veronica Mars over the weekend. I’m all “I KNOOOOW!”

She calls me. I miss it. I call her. She misses it. And so on.

The stalking continues.

Today, I email her: Do you want book x or book y for your birthday, as an alternative to my previous birthday suggestion.

Her reply: Shouldn’t you be preparing for your interview?

I say: Yeah, I was reading through my portfolio and got distracted by your birthday. It happens.

She says: haha. Am I in your portfolio?

I say: Haha. I have no idea how I went from staring at articles I’ve written to thinking about alternative birthday presents for you. My brain just never stops thinking of you, I guess. I am easily your creepiest friend. Possibly that is also what makes me the best.

So, yeah, I stalk my best friend and I’m not particularly ashamed of it.

She’s hard to catch. So the stalking continues. Eventually I will catch my prey.

I really couldn’t be creepier if I tried.

(Hi, Laura! Call me! I promise I won’t be at the gym this time with a phone that is dying!)

– Sarah #2


Alternatively, I’ll take a broom

June 18, 2010

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Pertinent piece of information #1: My best friend, Laura, lives in Memphis. I’m not very good at Math. Or Geography. However, according to my calculations, Memphis is about 3902394203.9 miles from where I currently reside. That is so gosh darn far. So far, in fact, that they don’t have a Dunkin Donuts. In lieu of iced coffee delights from the DD, they have what seems to be a tornado once a week. Seriously.

Pertinent piece of information #2: We really like Harry Potter. Best friends should have a handful of similar interests. Believe me, Harry Potter is not even our most pathetic shared interest. Let’s just say she may be the only person in the world who will ever understand me and the things I think are exciting – like Harry Potter.

Pertinent piece of information #3: The Harry Potter theme park at Universal Studios opened this week. Sadly, I wasn’t there. Please note that that link leads to an article detailing the fact that there was a live feed of the grand opening online. Also note that Laura texted me to say that she was actually watching said feed.

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Anyway, today I sent Laura a picture of this:

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A HARRY POTTER BRANDED PLANE. This is like when I was in London and I only wanted to ride the buses with the ads for Goblet of Fire. WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO RIDE ANYTHING ELSE?!

Shortly after sending it, I got an email reply from Laura.

Laura: Is this plane going to take you to Memphis? 🙂

Sarah: In the world of my dreams, yes.

In the world of my dreams I also own that plane and Laura lives next door to me.

– Sarah #2


My best friend is a dork too

April 7, 2010

My peep, Laura, and I have been making big plans to visit the new Harry Potter attraction at Universal Studios ever since we heard that it was being built.

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It’s been a major topic of conversation month by month, considering we both enjoy Harry Potter to the extreme. So, every time I stumble across an article about the new park, I immediately send it to Laura and we have intense conversation about it.

Example:

Me: i’m excited to drink butterbeer

Laura: MEEEEEEE TOOOOOOOOO. like way excited. I want it right now

Me: seriously. it’s a taste EXPLOSION

Laura: and pumpkin juice. and desserts… real english food, not so much

So, in case you wondered, my best friend is a dork too. I’m not alone here.


Fashion Advice.

November 14, 2009

I don’t consider myself very fashionable considering, if I had it my way, I’d basically just live in Under Armour sweatpants and hoodies 24/7. However, I have to abide by the fashion rules of Laura.

Me: i’m wearing a red sweatshirt and pink sweatpants. How much do you hate me right now?

Laura: eh sometimes it can be okay

Me: i’m just laying on my bed

Laura: I am wearing skirt with a pajama shirt. I kinda hate myself

Me: i’m glad we’re in the same unfashionable boat. at least i didn’t mix navy blue and black

Laura: that is a friendship deal breaker

Me: i know. i can never do that without picturing you yelling at me. so, it’s never going to happen

Laura: haha glad I put fear in someone

Me: haha, just me. and, i try to transfer for it to other people

Laura: I got a lot of ship people on the band wagon

Me: it’s a cause people can really stand up for

Laura: its easier than saving the world

Me: yeah, leave that to Buffy

Note to the world: Don’t mix navy blue and black. Laura says so.

– Sarah #2


Peeps. You wish you had them.

September 27, 2009

Sadly (?), this is a typical conversation between the two of us. We progressed from talking about my serious weekend to things that no one else would ever care about. We’re this cool in real life too.

Laura: God certainly has a sense of humor

me: ha. i dont find it all that funny. dear god, you’re not funny. stop trying. love, sarah- p.s. i’d like a million dollars

Laura: will you share?

me: duh. let’s spend it on trips to the set of general hospital and ice cream and shoes. let’s BUY the set of general hospital. OMG, THEN I CAN BE ON GENERAL HOSPITAL

Laura: and your life will be complete

me: yeah, then i can write my novel

Laura: you have enough material

me: i know! my current situation will just enhance the story. Hey silver lining, I’m Sarah.

me: unrelated to anything else: i want to carve a pumpkin

Laura: I carved pumpkins about 3 years ago

me: are you judging me? or is that just jealousy of my cool life? b/c i carved an awesome one last year. it was this monster. it took forever. my parents totally judged me

Laura: no, Im sad its been that long. last year we bought a pumpkin to carve but it got old and mushy before I carved it

me: then this is your year!

******

me: okay, i’m going to bed. i’m le tired from this craptastic weekend

Laura: yeah me too I need to get up in 7 hrs. blah

me: ew

Laura: I love you!

me: i love you mucho mas amiga!

Laura: gracias

me: de nada. hasta la vista

Laura: baby

me: haha byeee

Laura: bye!

– Sarah #2


Who You Gonna Call? (Peeps)

September 19, 2009

Screw the Ghostbusters.

Laura seemed to think that my post about her reaction to my pouring yogurt all over myself painted her in a bad light.

First of all, it’s impossible to paint Laura in a bad light. Second of all, I’ve never laughed harder than when she ran the 50 yard dash in first grade and completely bit it after about 25 yards. (I have it on tape. I’ll show you sometime). Friends forgive friends for laughing at the stupid things that happen to them.

Plus, you know someone is your best friend when she calls you on a Friday evening and you start crying and her reply is “Where is that cat you live with? Go find him and make him sit with you.”

Because only a best friend would know that that’s good advice and not a trivialization of my situation.

Plus, the cat was already in my lap. She knows me too well. So, it’s okay that she laughed at the thought of me being covered in yogurt.

– Sarah #2