I stalk my best friend, Laura. I am not even kidding. I literally stalk her.
Is she on gchat? No.
Is she on Facebook chat which I hate but will use to talk to her in extreme instances? No.
So a few days ago I see via Xbox that she’s on her Xbox watching Season 2 of Veronica Mars. I call her. She does not answer. I leave a message roughly saying, “Dude. You are watching Veronica Mars. TALK TO ME.”
I get an email the next day stating how she watched so much Veronica Mars over the weekend. I’m all “I KNOOOOW!”
She calls me. I miss it. I call her. She misses it. And so on.
The stalking continues.
Today, I email her: Do you want book x or book y for your birthday, as an alternative to my previous birthday suggestion.
Her reply: Shouldn’t you be preparing for your interview?
I say: Yeah, I was reading through my portfolio and got distracted by your birthday. It happens.
She says: haha. Am I in your portfolio?
I say: Haha. I have no idea how I went from staring at articles I’ve written to thinking about alternative birthday presents for you. My brain just never stops thinking of you, I guess. I am easily your creepiest friend. Possibly that is also what makes me the best.
So, yeah, I stalk my best friend and I’m not particularly ashamed of it.
She’s hard to catch. So the stalking continues. Eventually I will catch my prey.
I really couldn’t be creepier if I tried.
(Hi, Laura! Call me! I promise I won’t be at the gym this time with a phone that is dying!)
– Sarah #2